here once was a man who, every morning, looked in the mirror and said with all he could muster, “God, I’m such an asshole.” Then he’d shower, eat breakfast, shave, and leave for work. After work, he’d go home, eat dinner, and go to bed. Every day was the same, with only the reason he thought himself an asshole changing. Sometimes he was an asshole for something he thought on the train. Sometimes it was something he did at work. Some mornings he didn’t know why.
One morning he walked outside and saw an old lady crying on the curb. He stopped and asked, “What’s wrong?”
The old lady looked up and said, “My dog, he ran away.”
The man then sat with her a moment and asked her what the dog looked like. She said it was a shih tzu with black and white coloring and a pink collar.
He told her he would look for the dog. He called his boss, told him he would be late, and then proceeded to search for the dog. Finally he found the shih tzu lying outside of a laundromat drinking from a dish of water someone had set out for him. He took the shih tzu to the old lady. She thanked him, hugged him, told him he was a genuine soul, and offered him money. He wouldn’t take the money, but she insisted. So he took it and went to work. Feeling satisfied that he found the dog, he slept easier than he had ever before.
He woke up the next morning, got out of bed, looked in the mirror, and said, “God, I’m such an asshole.”