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American Politics Enters the Chrono-Synclastic Infundibulum

By 

Lara Dolphin

If you are in the mood to learn something,

you might learn that the dumb bastards on one side

of the aisle and the dumb bastards on the other side

of the aisle will never get on and not even experts

at the Belfer Center can tell you why.

You might think it would be nice to live in a country

where proponents of gun control and the Second Amendment

or supporters of legalized abortion and the right to life

are equally right, but it makes for a very dangerous place indeed.

And though you Veblen me and I social justice you,

what is gained is more than what is lost. So in this indifferent age,

take care of your fellow Americans while the politicians

take care of themselves and know that in a meaningless universe

full of hollow victories, there is room enough here for us all.

Quiz question:

Which of the following does the speaker of the poem NOT believe?

There is enough room in this universe for us all.

There is enough room in this universe for us all.

Arguing our opinions is detrimental more than it is helpful.

Arguing our opinions is detrimental more than it is helpful.

Both Republicans and Democrats are dumb bastards.

Both Republicans and Democrats are dumb bastards.

The American people should take care of each other.

The American people should take care of each other.

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Issue 13

published 

March 7, 2017

American Politics Enters the Chrono-Synclastic Infundibulum was written by Lara Dolphin who is a chocolate addict, slacktivist and determined dreamer. As a recovering attorney, pre-PA student and full-time mother of four, she divides her time between looking for lost Legos and breaking up pool-noodle-related combat. She has never been a billionaire, but she thinks that she would be really great at it. 

i dont feel like fininishing this website right now and i am sorry

I could eat a whole

platter but I think that one

would get boring quick.

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Issue 13

This writing was originally published in Opium Magazine, and is not listed in the Lit.cat archives.
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